Wednesday, March 13, 2013

I know you

Why call me a weird species, when I am not. It is just that I have weird thoughts. I love animals, dogs in particular. I love humans too. A little funny, crowned a drama queen, I am so full of myself, I can't stop obsessing my own. I love to jump, I love to skip, a broken leg but, I love to run when I can. I sing, my imagination is mild and wild as well. "Your eyes can kill", "I can die for that smile", I've heard, I've got them all.

The self obsession is not why I write this. I write this because I have been hearing from every guy I am close to say, "Brinda, I know you." Today, it was Parv, yesterday it was Dragon, I can go on and on adding names of guys close to me who have said this. And every time I hear this, I grin and give my face a weird twist only to go back to hearing the voice, "Brinda, I know you." when I walk Whiskey. Why do people keep saying that they know me? Yes! I am not a secretive person and I admit, I did make myself an open book, who is so easy to read.

Every time I hear the words, "Brinda, I know you." I can't stop analyzing on how much you really know me. And no matter what the outcome of my analysis is, I always conclude, the one person who knew me the way I know myself is Sid. Not that he comes to my mind much, but he sure is the person who knows me the best. It has been ages and yet, he still continues to top the list. He saw the crazy part, the drama part, the sad part, the angry part and parts that my tender age when I was with him could not see. And thinking about him as I write this, I recall him telling, "You are going to be a writer I would love to read". I never ever wrote when I was with him. Writing stuffs on birthday or, new year cards are not countable. But he could see something in those writings. While my fingers were crossed after I interviewed for Google, he was busy packing my bags saying, "you are going to Hyderabad". Trivial things written here but, there are such deeper things he knew about me and yet, he always said, "You are the most difficult person to understand", "So unpredictable". He just believed in me. Saw potentials in me that even I couldn't see. Always knew what I can do and what I can not before I knew. When everyone seeing my excitement on my birthday gift asked, "you got a car?" "you got this? you got that? he was the only one to say, "It's a dog. Isn't it?"

I stop here to recall the 0.5% memory of you I have left. Not a thing comes to my mind yet, I know there are many somewhere hidden and kept safe.  A gentle smiles leaves as I continue hitting the keys.

Not to say that the closest of my pals don't know me. They have always been true in the situation when they say, "Brinda. I know you". Giving it a thought, I think, I even like it when they say that. I like the variations too. Variation, especially when Mayand says, "You are not a bad girl. I've know you long to say that."

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